Sunday, February 09, 2014

Update on Stuffs? XD

Good morning, dear readers! :D

Wowzers, it's been about 9 days since I last posted on here (whoopsie!)!!! :O

I figured I would give an update as to what I have been doing in the last little while.

The other week I had to go to a psychiatrist appointment, and although my appointment went okay (I have to go up on a med), I don't drive, and so getting around can be tough.  My dad brought me to the hospital in the morning (at around 9:00, my appointment was for 9:45 but my dad has to go to work, and this was easiest for everyone involved), and I waited for a bit before going in.

I can get a lot of anxiety from being in town, especially by myself.  I was worrying all morning about going in, and when I finally did and finished my appointment, I was feeling pretty good. :D  I was proud of myself for not completely freaking out, and decided to try going downtown on the bus.


Oh, my, gosh.  BIG mistake. O_O; Well... yes and no.  I am proud of myself for taking the long trip alone, but I hope I didn't set my progress back any because of the sheer stress of it all. D':

I was freaking out so much, at one point I just had to rush off the bus at a random place because I needed to escape.  Every time I get a panic attack I feel like I need to escape and run somewhere.

Then I had to wait for another bus to go back on the route.  

Shortly after I got down there, I called my friend and asked him to meet up with me because I couldn't be alone anymore.  UGH anxiety SUCKS!!  Everything seems so out of balance, and my senses get overloaded.  Sounds are too loud, lights are too bright, everything can be an annoyance, and my heart is racing as I feel absolutely terrified.  >.<

Anyhoo, my friend is awesome and he met up with me.  We bussed back to his place, where I promptly fell asleep until I got picked up by my Dad in the evening.  We all headed back home, and I fell asleep again right after we got there.

I've always needed a certain amount of time to recuperate after excursions into town, and it took several days after this incident to relax.  Bleargh!


Other than that, I have been doing a lot of drawing lately (while watching Fullmetal Alchemist on Netflix!), and here is one of the pieces I have been working on:

Sorry about the blurry photo; I need to set up the light box in another room.

This is a character named Kenzi from the show Lost Girl.  This is the best out of my recent drawings, methinks!  I am not done it yet, but I should be soon. :D


On Friday I went to FNM, and we drafted 3 Born of the Gods packs, as the store didn't have enough Theros packs in stock (usually it would be 2 Theros and 1 BOTG).  It was pretty sweet, since it was the first day for BOTG to be released (except for the pre-release), and I could finally get my hands on some delightful goodies! :D

I also got a Fat Pack, and pulled some pretty sweet cards from it, and from my draft packs:

Sorry about the glare <.>;

I actually got Xenagos and Karametra in my Fat Pack, but I traded him to my sister for Ephara because I run a white/blue deck and she was the god I really wanted from this set :D.  

In the last draft pack that I opened, I pulled Brimaz, which was amazing!!  I had no idea at the time how much he was worth O_O!  Some of the other players were like "yeah, that is a $40 card", and I was all like "pfft, no way."  Yup, $40 card!! O_O  And perfect in my deck! :D

I got some other great cards too, which I am so happy about!  WOOHOO!


In conclusion, other than the extreme mental distress from that fateful day (and the other stress from my everyday mental conditions), I have been doing not too bad :D.  I am very fortunate in that I have such an amazing family, and amazing close friends who really understand me and give me support.  I seriously couldn't do this without them.  And thank you so much to YOU, dearest readers, because you have given me so much support over the years as well, and it really warms my heart that there are such lovely people out there in the world who genuinely care about someone they have never even met in real life before.  Thank you!!!

I hope that you have an amazing rest of the weekend, and I will try to be back on here sooner than 9 days from now XD.


-Ashesela :} 


  1. Cant wait to see your next amazing nail art or posts!! Hope you have amazing weekend :)

  2. Replies
    1. Thank you for your kind words, Lisa! <3

  3. Ugh...that sounds like a horrible experience! But hey, you scraped up the balls to do something COMPLETELY out of you comfort zone! That is a huge step! The fact that you took that plunge shows the progress you've made! Yeah, what happened sucked but you tried and that's what counts!
    Hope you feel better soon! It's always awesome to see new work from you!

    PS...You have mad talent when it comes to drawing! I might hate you a little at the moment! :P

    1. :'D Thank you so very much!! I really appreciate what you wrote, and you are really kind <3! I really appreciate that amazing compliment too!!!

  4. Wow that drawing is amazing! I recognized Kenzi right away, she's my favourite! Her eyes, OMG! I might be crushing on her a bit. ;-)

    1. YAY!! :D I love Kenzi, she is a favourite of mine too!! :D I know, right?! Her eyes are super amazeballs!

  5. Aw I'm so glad to hear that even with a lot of stress you were able to cope really well with being by yourself at your appointment! Your drawing is beautiful!

    1. Thank you very much Traci!! <3 I really appreciate that! :'D

  6. You are such a strong, inspiringly awesome lady, Ash, thank you for speaking so candidly about experiences like this that you face as part of your daily life. I don't doubt for a moment that doing so will help encourage others who may face similar situations and live life with mental conditions to do the same.

    That drawing is flat out amazing. You are an incredibly gifted artist.

    ♥ Jessica

    1. Thank you so very much, Jessica! <3 I appreciate your words more than I can say :'D!!

  7. great to see you back, can;t wait for more posts!

  8. That drawing is really amazing! I'm always really impressed with your artistic talents. :)

  9. I think you're so strong. I'm proud of you for how you handled yourself at your appointment. I'm sorry you had a bad experience. That drawing is outstanding!

  10. Going downtown Ottawa would be stressful for anyone!
    That picture is beautiful :)


  11. Anxiety is awful. I know exactly how you feel. :-/ The shallow breathing, heart racing, etc. I get panic attacks a lot myself. Also... not sure how your blog hasn't been showing up in my feed, but I thought I'd stop by. :)


Thank you for your comments! :D

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